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| "Dudes" info@rockstar69.com Thursday, March 31, 2011 11:26 PM |
Dear dudes
I fricking love Rockstar. It is the best thing since Red Bull. I drink like 2 or 3 cans a day, and man do I get amped! I mean, I'm sooooooooooooooo hooked. It's like some kind of sweet, mediciny drug. I don't care if it gives me chest palpitations or stomach pains, and I don't even care that I haven't taken a healthy crap in like three years, I love it!
I got this blog, right, it's super, and I love it! And I figure, why not take two things that I love and put them together, like some kind of drink-on-webpage love-it half-sandwich. What I'm saying is, I would like for you to pay me. Then I can talk up your awesome energy drink on my super blog, and dudes will all be like, "hey, I should buy some of that crap."
But I will do it all incognito and stuff. Be like, yeah I'll pretend not to like Rockstar like it sucks and is overpriced 'n junk, but with all my incessant name dropping, dudes will all be like, "man, gotta get me some Rockstar." Genius! Except if they think I'm talking about the movie Rock Star or Rockstar Games or even just some rock star, which could prolly get confusing.
Super. Please email me my first check right away.
Love,
Your Mother
Bonus! Don't tell anyone, but I hate the gays and non-whites and everyone, like that one guy. You know who I'm talking about....shhhh!
